by Natasha B. (Munro 2012)
My name is Natasha and I always thought I was a recovering Catholic.
Some people laugh when I say that, but I felt very overwhelmed by this idea of God and it made me think of the nuns in my school yelling at me for having a tongue piercing!
When I got to Step 2 I was told to write out my old beliefs and prejudices on one side and my new beliefs on the other …
|Old Beliefs||New Beliefs|
|Wanted me to suffer||Loving|
|Sat on his throne disappointed at me||Cared about me even with my flaws|
|Told me I had to work hard to get into Heaven||Wants me to help others|
|Had to go to church to feel GOD||Was everywhere|
When I wrote this out it made me see I had so many prejudices from my past that I had to let go of and move forward.
When I was two months sober I got the slogan “Let Go, Let God” on my chest, this was shortly after I did step two. I heard the slogan in meetings but couldn’t connect it with a God until I understood what he meant to me!
My God is personal to me! I don’t judge people today by their Higher Power if it works for them and can keep them sober.
Today I turn my life and my will over to my God. That is, I turn my thinking and my actions over to the God of my own understanding (sometimes I think to the God of my misunderstanding).
Sometimes I think God loves me so much, even when I mess up, and it fills my heart with gratitude.
I’m so grateful to have God in my life and I know when I trust Him nothing can go wrong.
Just for today I will be living Faith over Fear and for that I am beyond grateful!