For the better part of fifteen years, Dan says, drugs and alcohol felt like part of his identity. He believed his use was manageable, even helpful, in his job.
“You tell yourself a lot of lies,” he admits. “My addiction wasn’t impacting my work – until it was.”
What began as performance and promise – on track for a promotion, engaged, saving for a home — unraveled into job loss, a broken engagement, run-ins with the law, and a pregnancy from a casual relationship. “I was on track to prison,” he says bluntly. “And I was setting a poor example for the child coming into the world.”
As the “bright, shiny future” he’d envisioned began to slip away, Dan knew something had to change. He turned to Renascent’s Virtual Intensive Outpatient program because it offered a structured support that also allowed him to continue working. “I wanted to challenge myself to work recovery into my daily life, while also saving enough money to financially support the child I had on the way,” he notes.
In treatment, he learned practical skills that he could readily apply. “Renascent gave me tools I could use in my own life,” he says. “The program taught me how to say no, avoid risky situations, and build escape plans for moments of weakness. All those things have kept me out of the same cycle I was in before.” He also developed a new relationship with his thoughts. “I learned that thoughts are like trains coming in and out of the station,” he shares. “You can choose whether or not to get on them, and you don’t have to get on every one.”
Reframing accountability for his actions has also been a gamechanger. “It’s the little decisions,” Dan reflects. “Sometimes it’s just about making the next right, small, decision, rather than looking for something big to happen and propel you forward.”
Today he’s rebuilding his life, and laying the foundation for an even better future. In recovery, he says, “I’ve been given more chances than most. I’ve been the recipient of miracles, and I’m determined not to squander them.” He’s reestablishing himself professionally, prioritizes physical, mental, and spiritual health, and is active in his faith and community. “I’m proud to work within my church, and I volunteer with Big Brothers to give others the guidance I missed growing up,” he says. “In recovery, I’ve thought a lot about how the circumstances of my own life contributed to where I was. I want to help others avoid the same struggles.” Today, he says, his days are full and rewarding, but not overwhelming.
Dan’s advice to others struggling with addiction is tough, but compassionate. “Stop making excuses,” he says. “Your chances of success are directly proportionate to your willingness to change, and you must be willing to change nearly everything.
Do whatever it takes, because your disease will do whatever it takes to kill you. You won’t find out how good life can be if you don’t try to make it better – and if you give up on yourself, you won’t forgive yourself.”
