For Briann, alcohol offered an escape from her first sip at 13 years of age. It was a pattern that continued for the next 24 years.
“I kept trying to quit in different ways,” she shares. “I was always trying to control my addiction—but I always went back. Alcohol was a solution for me.”
Over the years, she experienced what felt like an endless series of rock bottoms. “I’d think I’d hit bottom, and then the trap door would open and I’d hit another, then another after that.
I didn’t believe there was a way out.”
The turning point came when she reached out to her local health centre in Fort Smith, Northwest Territories. “I had finally realized I couldn’t do it alone,” she recalls, “and I was desperate for help, that day if possible.” With no treatment centre available locally, she was connected to Renascent in Toronto – and despite the difficulty of leaving her three children behind, Briann committed to inpatient treatment.
The ultimate date of her admission—November 22—was deeply meaningful. “My mother had passed away from alcoholism on that date five years earlier,” she shares. “I took that as a sign. I couldn’t say no to recovery after that. It felt like a God shot.”
Still, it wasn’t until two weeks into her time at Renascent before she could truly accept she was an alcoholic. But when she did, “everything changed,” Briann recalls. “It felt like I was inside a snow globe that had just been shaken. My whole world turned upside down and I realized I had no idea how much I didn’t know.”
Although she spent her birthday, Christmas and New Year’s Eve in treatment, Briann began to enjoy the routines, group sessions, and stories of others who were there alongside her. Learning about brain chemistry and the importance of caring for her physical health was also transformative, she says, particularly since she hadn’t prioritized herself for years.
“In active addiction, I was aimlessly wandering. I could envision the life I wanted, but it felt like I was stuck in quicksand,” she says. But in recovery, “I’ve found peace and an understanding of purpose. It’s not my will, it’s God’s will. Every day, I make the decision to surrender.”
After returning home, Briann completed Renascent’s virtual aftercare program. Active in her recovery, she attends three AA meetings a week, sponsors others, works the Steps and surrounds herself with supportive, caring people.
“I once thought I was unforgiveable,” she admits. “But my children love me unconditionally. They’ve forgiven me, and I’ve forgiven myself. That’s huge.”
She adds: “Getting sober was terrifying. But I’ve learned I can’t become the person I aspire to be without letting go of who I was. I still catch myself trying to run the show—but now I know it’s not up to me. I surrender, sometimes many times a day, and I trust that if God brings me to it, He’ll bring me through it.
I just have to keep the faith.”
